I am excited to highlight some of my favourite books that I use in my work as an LGBTQ counsellor and trainer. This is part of a series of blogs.
Next up is ...
Queer Sex: A Trans and Non-Binary Guide to Intimacy, Pleasure and Relationships
Who wrote it?
Juno Roche – an internationally recognised trans writer and campaigner, and co-founder of Trans Workers UK and the Trans Teachers Network.
What the book is about?
Juno interviews a diverse range of trans and non-binary people about sex, desire and dating.
Interviewees include Fox Fisher, Ugla Stefanía Kristjönudóttir Jónsdóttir, Meg-John Barker and many more.
Published in 2018, this is the first in a series of three books about trans and non-binary people.
Other books in the series are:
Trans Power: Own Your Gender
Gender Explorers: Our Stories of Growing Up Trans and Changing the World
Why I find it Helpful?
This is a book like no other I had come across. When I first read it two years ago I was blown away by how honest and open Juno facilitated such deep and intimate interviews. It has helped me to continue to learn more about the diversity of queer sex, our bodies and desire. Reading about real people helped give me a further insight into how different queer people experience sex and intimacy.
I love the title too; it is so punchy and makes it clear what the book is about. I read my paperback copy with pride in public places.
Why I think clients will find it helpful?
Many clients I have worked with when exploring their gender and navigating their transition can be very anxious about sex. How will any changes they make to their body affect their sex life? How might hormones affect sex drive? Will they still be desired after coming out? Will their current partner still want to have sex? How might sex be different? Will their sexual orientation change? The list goes on …
Being able to read first-hand accounts from well-known trans and non-binary people about sex, intimacy and pleasure can be so affirming especially when clients don’t have any trans friends they would be able to talk to openly about this sort of thing.
I have never worked with a client who has had decent LGBTQ inclusive sex education in school. This is a very sad fact and I hope this will change for future generations. With this in mind I am well aware of the need for trans and non-binary people to find ways to learn more about queer sex and intimacy.
Why I think counsellors will find it helpful?
Many fellow counsellors I know seem to find taking about sex in the therapy room difficult. My guess is this comes from poor training and our society shying away from taboo topics. However in my experience so many clients want to talk about sex and need their counsellor to feel OK about this.
Over the years, clients have told me over the years that they have sensed embarrassment from previous counsellors and so shut down talking about sex. This is upsetting to hear.
As a trainer running workshops to help counsellors feel more confident working with LGBTQ clients, I am even more aware of how many counsellors find talking about queer sex difficult never mind talking about the cultural norms of cis/het sex.
I hope this book helps give more counsellors the confidence to think about and talk about queer sex in the counselling room.
Where can I buy the book?
You can buy the book from all good bookshops
If you are a publisher, author or even a reader and have a book you recommend I read and showcase please get in touch on the email above.
This is part of a series of book recommendations. Read more of my book blogs here.
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